Saturday, September 28, 2013

Falling into Fall, with Grace

I am not gonna lie...I Love Fall. The cool, crisp mornings. The lack of excessive outside heat. Not needing sunglasses to see outside. Rain. Clouds. Storms. Long sleeves and jeans, boots, sweatshirts. This is my season, the one when I'm at my happiest. Can you tell I'm an Oregonian, tried and true?!! Born and raised here, used to the cooler weather and the rain, okay with not having lots of 100 degree days during the summer and not having lots of snowy days during the winter. Yes, I love Oregon, and I especially love Fall!
 
Fall brings with it so many beautiful colors, as the leaves change from green to gorgeous shades of orange, red, and yellow. Apples are harvested, pumpkins are ready to pick and carve for Halloween. Children are into their school routines, excited about Halloween costumes, starting to think about Christmas and Santa. Thanksgiving is on the horizon, my most favorite holiday, a time to stop, gather with family, and truly feel your blessings surround you. A time to be thankful, give thanks, and pause before the hectic Christmas season takes over.
 
Fall is my season of new beginnings this year. I am remembering to focus on all the blessings, and let go of all the bitterness. No matter how positive I work on being in my daily life, the negativity seems to find ways to seep in. And that leads to bitterness and resentments, and "stuff" that can be hard to let go of. I have to make the choice, for myself, to not let the "stuff" control me, and that is emotional stuff, mental stuff, work stuff, family stuff, financial stuff, material stuff...there can be a lot of stuff that clutters up the mind and soul. With the changing of seasons, the sights and scents of Autumn, the incredibly beauty of Fall in Oregon, I am making that choice, for myself, to let the stuff go. I am focusing on the beauty, on true Thanksgiving, on "Giving Thanks" being more than just decor that I decorate my home with at this time of the year.
 
I won't always succeed, but God will continue to give me grace, and He will continue to offer gentle, sometimes subtle and sometimes not, reminders of my blessings. Thank goodness for His grace, and for the grace of those around me who allow me to stumble, even to occasionally fall (gracefully, of course!), knowing that I'll get up and do better the next time.
 
Happy Fall y'all! Hope you are embracing the changing of seasons with me!
 
 

Friday, September 13, 2013

An Inconsistent Note On Being Consistent

con·sis·tent

 adjective \kən-ˈsis-tənt\
: always acting or behaving in the same way
: of the same quality; especially : good each time
 
I love consistency. I believe when things are done in a consistent manner, there is peace in what you are doing or how you are behaving. Consistency is peaceful. When things are happening around you consistently, you know what to expect. You find yourself feeling content. You know what needs to be done, and you follow the method to do it. It's such a grand concept.
 

con·cept

 noun \ˈkän-ˌsept\
: an idea of what something is or how it works
 
The concept of having life be consistent is a worthy one. The reality...not so easy! I like to say that I am consistent at one main thing - being inconsistent. At work, I set up procedures, I type out directions and train my staff on how to do something, and remind them that it's written out step-by-step for everyone to follow, so we can all do it the same way and be consistent. Then reality happens, things get busy, and a shortcut is taken or a step is left out because it just needs to get done, now, and we'll be sure to follow the procedure next time. When there is more time. But there never is more time, so the procedure is lost in the chaos, and things are getting done so we don't concern ourselves as much with how they're getting done.
 
At home, I set up rules for my children, routines for keeping the household organized, methods I intend to follow, consistently, to keep life peaceful. Then reality happens, and time is short, and this comes up or that gets in the way, and everything falls to the wayside as we simply do what we must to get through the day. Rules are forgotten because they aren't enforced, routines change to meet the time constraints of life, and before you know it, summer is over, school has started, and all those amazing concepts I had of a consistent schedule to keep work and home life peaceful have dissipated, reality settles in once again, and we continue to get by, get through, accept "good enough."
 
Except the problem is, I don't accept that. I'm not okay with good enough, I'm not okay with getting by, I'm not okay with my concepts of consistency not becoming our reality. I'm not okay with any of that, but I can't make time stop, and there never seems to be enough of it to get the systems into place, to train everyone on what they are and to get everyone on board with it. I find this problem at work and at home, and the truth is, it's not that the time isn't there, it's that the time is being taken up with other things that I am allowing to take priority over what I know needs to be priority. Why is that? Why not just stop, get control of what I need to do, and do it?
 

fear

 verb \ˈfir\
: to be afraid of (something or someone)
: to expect or worry about (something bad or unpleasant)
: to be afraid and worried
 
There is the answer to my why - fear. Fear of what? Nothing, and everything. Fear that I will have everything under control, that I will achieve consistency and peace. It sounds silly to be afraid of that, but the fear of peace and contentment is the underlying cause of the chaos and discontent this world is living with. People are afraid to be happy and to simply live a comfortable life, because all around us is negativity, unhappiness, scary out-of-control situations like random violence, war, unemployment, skyrocketing cost of living, religious disaccord, government unable to get along, moral issues brought to the forefront of politics, one side against another side, it just goes on and on and none of it is consistent, nothing is uplifting, the news these days does not bring about a sense of hope. I think if you look transparently at whatever it is in your life that is making you unhappy you will find that fear is holding you back. And how can we get past this fear, when everywhere we turn there is hopelessness being thrown at us?
 

faith

 noun \ˈfāth\
: strong belief or trust in someone or something
: belief in the existence of God : strong religious feelings or beliefs
: a system of religious beliefs
 
The answer, for me, is faith. Knowing that I am not alone in the chaos; knowing that no matter what is going on in the world around me, there is hope for change. There is hope for a better future. God has plans, for each one of us, and if each one of us would seek Him and those plans, we could all live in a consistent, peaceful world. Faith brings hope; hope bring peace. This world needs hope, needs peace. This world needs faith, in a huge way, and it saddens me that so many turn away from God, reject faith, get stuck in the hopelessness, turn to money and things to try and find happiness and purpose. The devil is hard at work these days, and it's a shame that so many are willing to let him in, to let him destroy their hope and to allow him to provide them a false sense of security and happiness. The choice to believe in God or not, to let the devil into your home or not, to seek more or be okay with being stuck is yours. I don't get to choose for you, I don't get to change you, and I won't turn my back on you if we don't agree. But faith is a fundamental part of my life, of me, and I refuse to allow anybody to take that away from me. All the negative stuff going on in the world will not change my conviction that God is hard at work trying to bring peace to every single person, and He will not stop no matter how often He is pushed away. It's hard enough to face the fear, to find the hope, and to make the changes in myself, knowing God is by my side. I cannot imagine what it is like for those who don't have God in their heart. I pray for those individuals, and I pray for the country as a whole, because there is a lot of hopelessness around us these days, a lot of emotional voids trying to be filled with money, possessions, and insincere love; a lot of hurting people and uncertain children trying to make sense of the visuals they are assaulted with on TV, the internet, games, magazines. We glorify celebrities who are vulgar and immoral, splash them all over media giving them exactly what they are seeking - attention. Meanwhile the stories of real people doing real things to better the world and the lives of others are - nowhere. Our society is so backwards. And I am getting quickly off track of what I was trying to write about! I'll stop now, my rants about the trials and tribulations of modern society and the destruction technology has brought at the same time that it has brought enlightenment is a topic for another time! 
 
Whether you follow routines and procedures consistently is rather inconsequential in the large scheme of things; but living your life in a consistent manner, remaining consistent in your values, being steadfast about what you believe in - that is important. It is vital if you want to have honest relationships with people. You must know who you are at your core and what you believe in your heart, and share those things consistently with others. You must be consistent to be believed. It's hard, especially with all that is going on around us and with being surrounded by inconsistent individuals who continually choose unhappiness and allow negativity and pessimism into their heads and homes. Fight it. Fight the temptation to fall into those traps, fight taking the easy way out and giving in to the darkness, giving up being consistent to yourself and your values. Be a light to those around you, be consistent in staying positive and sharing your faith; there will be a person who sees that in you, sees that you are consistent with your walk and your talk, and they will seek what you have. There will also be many who don't want your peace, don't understand your contentment, and they will continue to turn away from what you have. But remain consistent, be yourself, and do not allow anyone else to take away your hope.

I leave you with this...If you are seeking contentment, but are stalled by fear, know that you are not alone in that quandary. But know also that you have within yourself what you need to overcome the fear, and put your concepts of consistency into place, and find peace. And if you are having doubts, and feeling alone but at the same time feeling nudges of something else - that is faith, those nudges are God, and you are never alone because He will walk by you and hold you every step of the way as you face your fear and find your contentment. His desire for each of us is to be content, and to find that contentment by seeking His purpose for us, and living out our purpose to the best of our ability. Often our purpose involves reaching out to and touching the lives and hearts of others; it involves stretching ourselves beyond our comfort zone, it may mean taking an uncharted path and being the pioneer that clears the path for others. Your purpose may be huge, it may be small, it may be to affect the lives of many or to simply affect the lives of those closest to you. But make no mistake...you do have a purpose. You do have a voice and a light, and you can promote change in this chaotic and negative world. Live with purpose, live YOUR purpose. 

"I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; And because I cannot do everything I will not refuse to do the something that I can do." Helen Keller