Tuesday, July 2, 2013

35 Going On...36

Today marks 35 years of yours truly being a part of this thing called life. My mom would tell you that from birth, I knew what I wanted and went for it!! I was the fastest of her 5 deliveries, (all done naturally mind you, and the last one being just 3 months shy of her 45th birthday...my mom is a Rockstar, people!! I aspire to be even a fraction of the kindhearted, caring, patient woman she is!), and she barely made it to the delivery room before I entered the world, strong-willed and spunky from the get-go!! Growing up, she would tell me I was 5 going on 15, 10 going on 20, 15 going on 35...you get the idea. Stubborn, opinionated, always knew what I wanted, didn't care to waste time on emotions and sensitivities. Just wanted to plow through the nonsense and get to the purpose!
 
So here I sit, 35 today, and very honestly feeling quite fulfilled with my life, and very much looking forward to year 36 and all that it will hold, not just for me, but for my family, my friends, and anyone who I meet on the journey of the next 12 months. Truth be told, when I was "15 going on 35", had you asked me where I wanted to be at 35, a lot of what I would have told you then is where I am at now. Other than the fact that at 15, and even at 20, I would have told you I was never getting married and never having children!! But I also would have told you that a lot of where I was going was really not in my control; that God had a plan for my life and I was going to do my best to seek His will. I believe that is a lot of why my parents felt I was older than my 15 years, because I knew there was more purpose to my life then what I was experiencing in high school with its social drama, its limitations of what could be taught within those walls, and its abundance of teenage angst, often driven by relationships and a need to fit in, to validate oneself through the acceptance of others.
 
Do you know, truly know in your heart, who you are and where you're going? Are you where you want to be? I see so many people who seem to be 35 going on 25...or even 35 wanting to be 18 again. This is mind-boggling to me! Embrace who you are right now, and if you aren't happy with yourself, make a change!! Empower yourself to be 35 going on 36, to be content with where you are, and if not content then to step up, step out of comfort, and do something to allow true happiness into your life. It's a chaotic world out there, but you do not have to allow that chaos to overrun your desire to be better tomorrow than you are today. There are excuses all around you for not taking a stand, for not bettering yourself, for not taking that leap of faith and finding your greater purpose. Because, make no mistake, God has a purpose, a desire for you, but you must be willing to seek it, to seek Him, to listen and follow Him, to get uncomfortable at times, to be, in all honesty even though it sounds like a cliche, the change you want to see in the world. You only hold the power to change yourself; through that you can empower others to go forth and make changes as well, but it starts with you.
 
I have lived 35 years full of blessings; sure there have been difficulties and heartaches along the way, but the blessings far outshine those and the blessings are what I choose to focus on. I look forward to what God has in store for my next 35 years, and my daily prayer is that I am on the path He has intended for me. I hope you know that I pray this for you also. You have a purpose, and you matter. Seek your purpose, embrace your 35 without wishing for 20, let go of regrets or dwelling in the past and simply focus on your purpose for now, this moment, and future moments that you have the ability to change for the better.
 
Thank you, Dad and Mom, for the life you gave me, for the God you taught me to trust in, and for always encouraging me to be myself.

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